Home > Mental Health, Time To Talk 2018 > #TimeToTalk Day 2018

#TimeToTalk Day 2018

I’ve submitted a piece to the people who run the #TimeToTalk blog, in the hope that they might find it helpful to support #TimeToTalk Day, which is tomorrow. They receive many more submissions than they can actually use so I doubt that my post will be one of them – rather than waste it I thought I’d share it here, to raise awareness of the day. If you’d like to find out more their website is here, and there are loads of resources available for you. I was particularly taken with this one:

This is what I wrote:

I was diagnosed with depression in late 2011. After months of treatment, both with medication and counselling, I finally returned to work more than nine months later. Perhaps ironically, I worked for a large NHS Trust which provided mental health services – though I didn’t live in the Trust’s catchment area – and whilst I had had a fair amount of involvement with service users in my twenty years there, most of the people I worked with hadn’t.

When I first returned, initial reactions were mostly of the ‘I haven’t seen you for a while’ variety. It was clear to me that only a few people knew why I had been off work, and I decided early on that the best way to tackle this was to be open and honest with anyone who asked about it. Not that I shouted it from the rooftops, but I wanted people to know and understand why I had been away, what it meant for me, and what it might mean for them. Some seemed apprehensive – I think they feared I might ‘have a turn’ or do something strange! The difficulty with any mental health problem is that other people can’t see it, in the same way they can see a broken leg, for example. This adds some kind of aura, a mystique, and can instil in some a fear of the unknown and unseen. I didn’t want to start some kind of crusade, but I believed it important to share my experience with anyone who asked. After all, to all intents I was the same person they had known for years, so why should they now treat me differently? Some might have had an expectation that I had changed in some way, and I wanted to reassure them that whilst the illness was a part of me I was still that same ‘me.’ People who have suffered a mental illness deserve to be respected as themselves: the illness isn’t a badge they must wear or, worse, a stigma to be borne as some sign of weakness.

I retired a little over a year later, and having already started my own blog I was aware how important it is for fellow sufferers to know that they are not alone, that others have shared something similar. But that isn’t the same for those who have been lucky enough not to suffer. I probably had around fifty conversations with co-workers in that last year at work, and made a point of telling them a few key things:

1. There is no shame in having been diagnosed with any kind of mental illness.
2. It can happen to anyone, at any time.
3. It is far more prevalent than people imagine, and it was quite likely that other people we worked with had similar problems.
4. Whilst some may not, many will welcome an initial approach of the ‘is everything ok?’ type. It does help to talk, and an informal chat can often be all that is needed to help someone.
5. Don’t be judgemental – people need to be heard, not given well-meaning ‘diagnoses’ by friends who aren’t qualified to judge.
6. Having been diagnosed doesn’t change who you are, and shouldn’t change how others see you.

I’d like to think that, in my own little way, I did something to help understanding and awareness. The important part of this was that it was on a one to one basis: I’m a great believer in the need for efforts to be made to widen the general population’s knowledge on mental health, and this low key approach is a good way to do that. Just imagine how many could be enlightened if we all had just one chat!

This Thursday, 1 February, is #TimeToTalk Day. The day is all about opening a conversation: this may be with someone who may need support; it could be to help raise general awareness of mental health issues; or it may be to help people be more sensitive and caring towards each other. I hope you join in – no special skills or resources are required, just be yourself and talk to someone. You may be pleasantly surprised at what happens.

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  1. February 8, 2018 at 9:01 pm

    Love this post, thank you for being so honest as it’s so important we talk about these things. I think just by starting conversations and not treating mental illness like some dirty secret is a really crucial step in breaking the stigma and raising awareness. I have post natal depression and suffered in silence for a while as I felt ashamed and was scared people would think differently of me. I now write about it honestly on my blog as I never want anyone to feel as lonely as I did in those weeks before I got help xx #BlogCrush

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 8, 2018 at 10:14 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words. Sharing about mental health was why I started blogging and although I’ve rambled off down other paths it’s a subject near and dear to my heart and to which I’ll always return. I’m sorry to hear that you suffer from PND – it’s an illness many don’t understand. People assume that you’re so happy with your baby that nothing could possibly be wrong – and that is often far from the case. I’m glad to hear that you’re getting help, and I hope that support is improving life for you. I’ll follow your blog, I’d like to hear more about how it’s going for you xx

      Like

  2. February 2, 2018 at 11:11 am

    thank you for writing. I’m now a follower#blogcrush

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 2, 2018 at 11:13 am

      Thank you! I’ve returned the compliment 😊

      Like

  3. February 1, 2018 at 10:13 pm

    Thanks for sharing your story.
    I’ve written about my mental health issues here: https://mrmatthewruddle.com/2017/10/20/opening-up-about-mental-health/

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 1, 2018 at 10:27 pm

      Thank you Matthew. I’m now following your blog. Take care

      Like

  4. February 1, 2018 at 8:21 am

    Interesting read Clive
    Your time to talk day is similar to our Are you OK day (RUOK? Day)
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/RUOK%3F_Day
    Cathy

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 1, 2018 at 11:27 am

      Thanks Cathy. I’ve heard about your day too, I think similar things happen elsewhere. They’re much needed, sadly.

      Like

  5. January 31, 2018 at 3:39 pm

    Excellent. And so important. I shall share it to my fb pages tomorrow.

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 31, 2018 at 3:45 pm

      Thank you, that’s very kind of you 😊

      Like

  6. January 31, 2018 at 3:36 pm

    Well done Clive. hope they use it, but hopefully many wlil read it here, and I will retweet.

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 31, 2018 at 3:45 pm

      Thanks Enda. I think I was probably a bit late out of the blocks for them, and they do get a lot of blogs sent to them. Many thanks for the tweetshare 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Amanda
    January 31, 2018 at 2:57 pm

    Excellent! 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  8. January 31, 2018 at 2:50 pm

    Love this

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 31, 2018 at 2:53 pm

      Thank you, that’s very kind of you. As always with posts like this, even just one person helped makes it worthwhile.

      Liked by 1 person

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